Anarchy In The SU

Many years ago I was in Dublin for some reason or another, and I strolled into the main square of Trinity College. There was a fair amount of commotion going on, and on closer inspection I saw a giant three-sided layout of tables around the perimeter of said main square. At each table were people extolling the virtues of various college societies and groups and whatnot via the use of pamphlets, witty posters and large breasted girls in tight t-shirts. Political parties were represented too, with eagle eyed scouts trained to find the kind of soul-less demons who join political parties whilst at college. There were all sorts of things; wall climbing clubs, jujitsu clubs, etcetera etcetera. I strolled about trying to avoid eye contact with anyone who would try to get me to join their cults. I did decide, however, to engage the lovely people over at the anarchist society’s table. I can’t remember why now, but there is a high possibility they had strategically placed an attractive women at their desk and I wanted the chance to awkwardly talk to her for a few moments before scurrying off.

I loitered about, reading their pamphlets (or at least pretending to) and generally made myself known. I decided to jump right in the deep end and asked if I could join.

“Sure! Just sign your name here”

“OK”

“And put your Trinity student number here”

“Ah, I don’t have one”

“Oh, that’s OK, when you get one you can join”

“Oh, I won’t be getting one, I am not going to college here”

“You can’t join without a student number”

“I can’t join the ANARCHISTS SOCIETY with out a student number from TRINITY?”

An uneasy silence followed. They all looked at each other in vain for one of them to come out with a suitable reply. All of the assorted Anarchists then sheepishly looked down at their shoes.

“er. No”

“why?”

“………….its the rules”

I stayed around long enough just for the absurdity of the situation to sink in. Then strolled off, fueled by my own smugness.

Incidentally, many years later when I did indeed become a student at Trinity College, I decided against trying to join the group. By that stage I had realised what a complete waste of time that would be. I did however walk past a sign one day, advertising an Anarchist’s Book Fair and entertained thoughts of going in and just talking all the books and walking out without paying. Or setting fire to them with a lighter/deodorant-can concocted homemade flame thrower. And by them I mean the anarchists.